I think this is one of the most beautiful words in the English language because of its meaning. Things were broken, and now they are repaired, re-established, made new.
When I wrote early this week on Never, I was struck later on in the day by the realization that all these things I said you should “never do in marriage” are on that list for a reason—because people have done them. In fact, they are all things I’ve done in relationships. Not in marriage but in relationships before this one. And they were all pretty hurtful. Hurtful to me and person I did them too but also hurtful to the relationship. I learned a lot of lessons about how to cause hurt, mainly by doing it.
That’s why I love the word reconciliation. I paused to look it up to see how Dictionary.com defined it. I was pleasantly surprised to see this “Matching Quote” on the page:
“All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ, and has given us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting the message of reconciliation to us.”
Dictionary.com attributed it to “unknown author” but in fact this “quote” comes straight from the scriptures, Paul’s writings in 2 Corinthians 5:18-19.
The words are beautiful. Reconciled to himself {God}. Our trespasses not counted against us. Written by Paul, the sinner of sinners, a killer of Christians. He understands reconciliation. God forgave him and put him on a mission—He entrusted Paul to share the message of reconciliation, that others might know God’s forgiveness through Christ.
These words melt my heart. Especially when I consider all the ways that I’ve perpetuated hurt in past relationships. That’s not to say I wasn’t also hurt. There’s plenty of that too, but the only thing I can do anything about is what I did to others. Therefore, I too, write to remind you of the beautiful message of reconciliation.
If you’ve done the hurting. If my Never list was hard to read because of the truth of those things in your own life. There is freedom. There is forgiveness. From the words that shouldn’t have been spoken, to manipulation, withdrawal and infidelity. All of these things can be reconciled. You are not without hope. Of course, I can’t speak to how your spouse will respond. But I can tell you how God responds to a humble heart in search of forgiveness. It is yours. Just like that. Through Christ.
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